Monday, July 25, 2011

I can't sacrifice

A little while back, I read an article on Yahoo! about women cheating.

One lady really loved swimming and surfing and all things to do with the sea. Her boyfriend didn't. So when she visited her family on the coast, and met a guy who was sweet AND loved the sea, she ended up drawn to him.

At the end of the article, one of the guidelines was to think about the things you can't sacrifice. Here's an example from my personal life. I have this thing about tall, bony guys. Seriously, 6 foot 6 and thin as a rake will give my palpitations. To the point where I have struggle to let my brain stay in the driver's seat.

I once had a boyfriend who was 2 inches shorter than me. I told myself it didn't matter. I mean it's just height. But I felt like I ran into it at every juncture. If we took a bus together, and I wanted to lean on his shoulder, I couldn't. When we kissed, I didn't have to tiptoe. I tried to bury it, because frankly those are silly (and shallow) reasons to walk away. But, when it finally ended for unrelated reasons, I decided I didn't want to be with a short guy again.

Sometimes, I think it's unfair. I mean, he didn't make himself shorter than me. He shouldn't be judged for things he didn't choose. That's what one part of me believes.

The other part knows I'm just being realistic. That first dude couldn't help not liking the sea. So there's a sacrifice to be made somewhere. Either he sacrifices himself and goes with her (sometimes), or she sacrifices herself and doesn't go (much). Like the article says, it comes down to what you can and can't sacrifice. Would you rather have this thing, but not exactly as you want? Or would it be better not to have it, if you can't have it with that special condition?

I know I love freedom and variety, in thought, literature, movies, friends, cultures, locations, etc. I feel like it's something I can tone down, but not give up. My life will always involve different countires and different languages. I know that it's important to me that my books be available worldwide. Because I grew up outside the big countries, and hate the words, "Offer available only in..." I feel like these are things I couldn't give up. There are other things (like tall men), and I will definitely have to make a list to save myself the heartache, but I feel like these are the most important for me. In life and in publishing.

How about you? What sacrifices are too much for you?

It's Monday, that's what's on my mind.


Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

You make me very glad I'm taller than my wife!

Glam,Glitz&Gut said...

I loved this post! I cannot be with someone who doesn't like kids, my sister and brother mean the world to me and I spend a lot of time with them.

Marsha Sigman said...

I would never be able to give up writing.

And there are certain moral values that shouldn't be compromised. No, I won't help you rob a bank, stuff like that.

And I was always pretty firm on that tall thing