Guess who's back? Back again?

Unholy bean-licking umbrella stands, Batman!

I don't know what happened. I seriously don't. I mean I knew it was happening, and then - blink - it's been 6 months since the last time I posted.

There's been a lot going on since then. I was busy with a friend that came to visit for a while. But mostly I've been studying. The programme I work on (JET Programme) has a 5 year limit. It's my 5th year. I've decided that I want to stay, which means I need to find a job next year. In my linguist/writer mind that also means that I need to be ABSOLUTELY FLUENT. This includes being able to read and write. (Ever heard of an illiterate writer?) So I've learnt 1000 kanji (Japanese/Chinese writing characters) in a little under a year.  And right now, I'm studying for a comprehensive Japanese exam at the end of the week.

 I haven't written in eons (studying, remember), so I don't know how many writing-related posts will go up. And I'm saving (in the face of joblessness) so I don't know if there will be any giveaways for a while. And I still have a lot of studying to go, so no guarantees on posting every day either.

But I still have stuff to say, and I miss saying it.  

So I'm back. 

Why I Write: Questions

I have to re-read MARCELO IN THE REAL WORLD by Francisco X Stork for a retreat assignment. (Happy, happy, it was one of the best things I read last year.) Near the end of the book, Marcelo has a conversation with the rabbi, and it got me to wondering if Francisco X Stork believes the things the rabbi says. Which turned into wondering what people would think I believe if they read my WIP. It's about censorship, and while the MC goes hardline against it, I do support some censorship. For example movie ratings are a form of censorship that I, and many others, support.

And then I thought about critiques I've seen of YA authors in the past years. Sometimes critics do equate a person's fiction with their beliefs. But I don't always believe the conclusions my characters draw. In fact, as I've mentioned, my opinion is middle-of-the-road and I would make a wet sock of a character.

I came to realise during this line of thinking, that sometimes, I don't write because I have an answer, but because I have a question. My last WIP deals with what it's like being friends with a bi-polar person (for real, not the Hollywood/Charlie Sheen version). It doesn't present every possible thing that could go wrong, or right, for that matter. But it opens the door to questions. What are bi-polar people like? What's it like having one close? What's going through their minds?

I'm wishy-washy. I am not resolute about many things. And my work is a way for me to explore all those questions that I have. Questions about parts of me. About my beliefs. About the thins that happen to those around me. About things I see on the news. Many people often have hardline beliefs that they've been brought up with or taught by society or read somewhere and adopted. I hope that my work can open these questions for those people - the type of people who didn't even realise there was a question.

I can't remember every mentioning it before, and last night when I thought it, it felt new. So here's one more reason why I write: because I have more questions than answers.

Divergent

Yesterday, I spoke about my faction according to the divergent quiz: Candor. But I also said that everything about Candor didn't quite sit well with me. It's taken me a whole year and reading the second book in the DIVERGENT series (INSURGENT) to realise why. I'm divergent!

You'd think I would have come up with that a long time ago, since it's an integral part of the book's premise, but well, yeah...

Unlike the "true Candor," I don't see everything in black and white. In fact, I don't really see any thing in black and white. I believe in truth, but many of those truths are not absolute, as I see them. And even where I see a truth as absolute, I think that others have have every right to believe something different.

A part of me is AMITY.

 It's the Amity in me that fights with black and whiteness of Candor. The Amity in me believes that everyone gets to make their own choices as long as they aren't hurting anyone. Amity is the only faction whose clothes I would (and do regularly) wear. Three of the factions wear neutrals (black, white, gray) and Erudite wears blue, which I despise. That doesn't seem like a big deal, but the clothes represent the belief systems of the factions. And I dress brightly, like Amity, because that's how I (generally) feel and what I want to promote.

 Another big draw for Amity is the appreciation of music and the arts. Well, duh. *looks around writer's blog* Amity, moreso than any other faction, cultivates humanity. And I'm all about humanity, which I suppose, is why my Candor truths are gray, because where people are involved there is no black and white.

 I'm a natural peace-keeper too. It really drains me to see people fight. That's not to say I'm perfect and I don't get emotional and argue as well. But when I'm thinking clearly, the search for peace - or really community - is my second guiding principle.

The Amity celebrity: Professor X. Pretty much the only thing that stops him from being just like Magneto is that he just wants everybody to get along. 

The next strongest faction in my life is Erudite. This is probably the most obvious from the outside. At 30, there are only (approx) 2 years of my life where I haven't been in school in some capacity. I speak 5 languages. I'm certified in all kinds of random stuff that I may never use, like Italian and Event Planning. Other people don't get it when I "just take a class" with no end in sight.

I hate conflict, but my mother always says I should be a lawyer. That's because I like when things are "right". Logically speaking, that is. And sometimes, I argue for the things I believe to be so. But I could never be a lawyer because of the peace-seeking nature, and because I won't go against the truth. The Candor, and the Amity are in conflict with the Erudite, and I think the Erudite in me only shines through when it doesn't conflict or when it's a reflex.

And of course when it comes to answering any problem with an empirical solution, the Erudite mascot is Hermione.

When I think about this combination, I think most writers must be a combination of these three. Obviously, we're Amity, as we love the arts. We are Candor as we search for the truth, and Erudite as we seek and use knowledge. I guess the stories we tell and how we choose to tell them is influenced by which of the 3 shine brightest in us, and if any of the other factions are thrown into the mix as well.

I am CANDOR

I've just finished Veronica Roth's INSURGENT, the second in the DIVERGENT series.

DIVERGENT summary (from Amazon):

In Beatrice Prior’s dystopian Chicago world, society is divided into five factions, each dedicated to the cultivation of a particular virtue—Candor (the honest), Abnegation (the selfless), Dauntless (the brave), Amity (the peaceful), and Erudite (the intelligent). On an appointed day of every year, all sixteen-year-olds must select the faction to which they will devote the rest of their lives. For Beatrice, the decision is between staying with her family and being who she really is—she can’t have both. So she makes a choice that surprises everyone, including herself. 

When DIVERGENT first came out, it was all the rage to do The Faction Quiz on facebook, and share the results on blogs and twitter feeds everywhere.  I did the test, but I never shared my result.

I am Candor.

 

Why have I never mentioned that, despite the fact that I enjoy the book, and participate in other memes with fair frequency? Firstly, Candor is about the least exciting a faction can be. Secondly, they're not really painted in the best light. And thirdly, I don't wholly identify with them. 

 

The thing is I didn't need the test to tell me I'm Candor. I'll tell anybody any day that I prize truth about all else. It's about the only thing I can guarantee I'm good at. I might not be the most selfless, or the bravest, etc, but I can almost guarantee that I am the most honest person you will meet.  If you ask me a question, you wil get an honest answer, probably sugar-coated, but still honest.

So let's look at why I haven't claimed my Candor until now. As I said, they aren't that exciting. All the other factions get to do all this cool stuff. If you look up badass in a dystopian dictionary, there's a picture of the Dauntless symbol. You have to respect Abnegation for the sheer level of will it takes to constantly put others before themselves. And they make great leaders because they always think of the common good. The Erudite spend their days thinking and developing the technology that the rest of the society needs. And Amity, apart from not getting involved in the politics of the society, grows the food for everyone, because they have the patience, of course.

 I guess it's a reflection of my real life. I mean it sounds really cool that I'm out in Japan. And it is actually pretty cool. But I'm a regular teacher. And while teachers are awesome, we're a dime a dozen. Even moreso than that, I am a writer. I just want to tell my stories, write my truths, philosophise. (Guess what my best subject was in my Coast Guard Academy days? Morals & Ethics. Thoroughly useless, but Candor all the way.) And writers aren't cool. Not unless they have 3-book deals with Harper Collins or "NYT Bestselling" in front of their names or they are one of the handful that everyone in the world can name.

And then there's the way Candor is painted in DIVERGENT. All of the factions take their virtue to the extreme, sacrificing other virtues on the way. But Candor feels the worst to me. They sacrifice consideration for others in the name of truth. They say whatever comes to mind, whether or not it's hurtful. That's too high a price for the truth. 

So I'm Candor with a caveat. I believe in truth. Truth above all else. But I don't believe that I must always sacrifice everything else in the name of truth. Nor do I believe that everyone else has to believe the same things I do. Unlike the Candor in INSURGENT, I don't share my truth where it's not asked for or neccessary, essentially shoving it down the throats of others. 

I suppose, if you've been following this blog for a little while, you've could come to these conclusions on your own. I share my opinions here, even when they are not the popular or political correct ones. But I never shut down anyone who thinks differently. And I try hard to present my posts objectively, even when they are personal and passionate.

I am Candor.

 

Of course it doesn't help that this guy's supposedly one of us. Yum!

Come back tomorrow for the sequel to this post. And share your Faction if you have one.

Why I don't write homosexual characters

In December, I explained the situation as far as Barbados is concerned with homosexuality. Generally, we don't support it, but we don't run around beating people up for it, either. Since then, I've seen many of my bloggy buds and others on the web asking for more homosexual characters. I doubt I'll ever be one to write them.

I DON'T KNOW WHERE I STAND

The overwhelming reason I refuse to write a homosexual character is because I don't really know where I stand on homosexuality. I am a Christian and I come from a largely Christian nation. So, I've got the traditional Christian input. Homosexuality is wrong.

On the other hand, in my time traipsing around the world, I've met lots of homosexuals. Many of them are good people. (As with any group, there are evil people here too.) And there are many non-homosexuals who do "worse" things.

SOMEWHERE IN THE MIDDLE

I suppose the first time I really had to confront the issue was after a close friend came out. I had to wrangle with it for myself. (This is one reason I hate coming out stories where everyone is either "Yay, you came out!" or "I'll never speak to you again, Abomination! I think there are a lot of people who respond like me. They need time to think and feel.) My end position was this: I'm still his friend. I still believe in him as a person. I don't know what God feels about his sexual choices. I don't have the right to judge them. But I also don't feel like I should neccessarily be celebrating them either.

I feel like that position would make for a wishy washy character.

THE MORAL OF THE STORY

While my views are somewhere in the middle, I've spent most of my life on the anti- side of the fence. I feel like if I tried writing  a homosexual character they might push some of the morals I've been brought up with. That could only lead to a self-loathing character. 

AND ON MY END

Most of the reasons I won't write a homosexual character have to do with how the end result turn out. But there is one reason that has more to do with me. When I tried to write the quake novel (about 311 - North East Japan's Quake/tsunami/nuclear disaster), I discovered that some stories can scratch right down to your soul. I feel like it would be really painful to explore the parts of my psyche I need to produce a homosexual character, and to keep that character and plot alive for at least 50,000 words. (And that's not even considering revisions.)

THE BOOK I CAN WRITE

There is one book that I hope to write which does involve a homosexual character and storyline. Like my own personal experience, it's about a character who's best friend comes out. The best friend has mostly dealt with the issues arising from her homosexuality, but the MC has to find where she stands.

WRAP IT UP

I feel  a tad like a hypocrit. I'm always preaching about "Other" characters. There are multiple races in every novel-length manuscript of mine. There's one disabled character, and there will be more. There are people representing different countries. But there isn't a single homosexual. Apart from the one I mentioned in the last paragraph, there may never be. But I feel better not writing homosexuals, than writing the type of homosexual characters and stories that do more harm than good.

* I use the word "homosexual" rather than the more politically correct "LGBTQ" because that's what I mean. Much of this post doesn't apply to the "BTQ" and they just may turn up. Who knows?

What I actually do

Congrats to THE IMMORTAL RULES winner, Sana!

Last week, I talked about the parts of my job that my employers mandate. But I'm kind of hired for more than that. I'm on the JET programme. It's a Japanese government initiative which hires people into 3 job roles. Apart from your job role, the JET programme also asks participants to "promote grassroot internationalisation."

EIKAWA

Eikawa is the place where internationalisation and teaching naturally meet. It's a Japanese word meaning "English conversation" and is generally used to mean any English class, outside of school, which focuses more on the spoken aspects. My town doesn't require me to teach eikawa, nonetheless, my neighbour started one up in my first year, and it's been going strong ever since.

As our eikawa is so informal, it really provides a chance to learn more than English. We - the town's 3 ALTs from 3 countries and the Japanese adult students -  get to exchange ideas. We present about our cultures, and show bits of it. Best of all, we get to know one another. For my first 2 years, most of my Japanese friends in town were from eikawa. Our interactions outside the classroom did a lot for my understanding of Japanese culture, and their understanding of mine.

 FORMAL ACTIVITIES

There are a million and one formal ways to internationalise. The simplest and easiest is to present on your culture in the classes you're already teaching. At elementary school, I'm pretty free and flexible. So once I get ahead in the text book, I occasionally include a lesson with Bajan culture. I do Halloween and Christmas lessons. I tell the kids about the rest of the world.

And there are formal activities outside the classroom as well. The various international organisations in my prefecture put on various events. So far, I've done a general presentation on Barbadian culture, and a cooking class with Barbadian food. (I also did cooking classes with the eikawa.) And there's a big international fair every year. I've hosted a booth there, basically just telling people where Barbados was, and a few facts, and listening to Bajan music.

YOU SEE ME, THEREFORE I AM

Why would something like internationalisation even be important enough to mention right next to your official job role? To understand, you have to think of the Japanese position. Japan is an archipelago off the coast of Asia. They spent hundreds of years at war with their neighbours. They purposely shut themselves off from the rest of the world at times. And they are the only country with Japanese as their first language.

All of those things combine to equal a simple fact. Japan sees only Japan. Unlike the rest of us, who see and understand the rest of world, Japanese people can (and often do) forget there is a rest of the world. And many of them have no idea what that rest of the world is like.

I am a fountain of information. People can find out that Coca Cola exists outside Japan (yes, I've been asked), that the word "bye-bye" did not originate in Japanese, that black people have different hair from Japanese people.


My mere existence here is a reminder of the world, of the Caribbean, of Black people, of English-speakers. I think I do most of my internationalisation when random people talk to me on the streets of my town, or on the bus, or the train, or even with the new teachers at school. Especially being from Barbados.

There are a couple THOUSAND Japanese people that only know that Barbados exists because of me. Last week, I was at a PTA drinking party (um, that sounds so horrible- Japanese culture does not translate simply), and the lady next to me was the Mom of a Junior High student I'd been teaching since she was 8. She told me her daughter loved English and that she'd come home and told her the English teacher was from Barbados and she actually looked it up!

My being here also translates into people trying with English. My students will often scream "Hello" at me from across parking lots. Some of my spunkier JHS students will think up random comments. "My name is legend. I am dangerous," and "You have Canada face" to a Canadian ALT. Sometimes I run into random students from other schools, towns, etc, and they'll try their hand at having a conversation. And random adults will as well. Sometimes they will say strange things. Very, very strange things. Like the urologist who said, "I penis doctor. Penis turn black, fall off? Call me." (Ah, sweet memories!) All these people try because they see me.

WRAP IT UP
My VISA says "INSTRUCTOR" and my town technically pays me to teach. But there are days when I teach nothing at all. And even when I am teaching, it's not earth-shattering. I've already mentioned that elementary school and kindergarden English aren't really meant to "teach" so much as to make kids receptive to English/foreign languages. And so, I often feel like the more important job is the one that is less measurable, the one that doesn't have a start and end time. The one I do all day long merely by being.

In the Field: Gilmore Girls and Not Getting It

Don't forget today is the final day to enter THE IMMORTAL RULES giveaway.

Today, I'm starting up another new series, "In the Field." So far this year, I've watched all 6 seasons of DAWSON'S CREEK and all 7 of GILMORE GIRLS. Additionally, I've watched/rewatched a few anime series. And then there are all the books. And since I've been reading so many craft books, I keep picking up lessons from the stories I watch and read. So I thought I'd share these lessons I learn from stories out "In the Field."

NOT GETTING IT

One of the things Gilmore Girls is known for is their reference-dropping. Let's say Gilmore Girls drops 100 references an episode. The average person gets about 20 of them. People with a special interest in movies or tv or rock music get about 40. Pop culture-aholics get about 60. Pretty much nobody gets every reference. And Gilmore Girls was still a hit. It still had a 7 year-run. It was powerful enough that, almost a decade after the fact, I bought myself the series.

New writers are often tempted to explain everything. But even more experienced writers may shy away from references that people may not get. Gilmore Girls teaches us that they don't always need to.

CONTEXT

Something I had to realise as a language learner, is that it's less important to understand every single word than it is to get the general gist. The same is true of stories.

A GG example:

Richard's mother, Trix, constantly puts down Emily, his wife, and Emily generally becomes a nervous wreck whenever she's around. Lorelai tells her that she has to find her own way to fight back. So one night, when they are having dinner at Lorelai's inn, Emily stages a coup. When Trix asks for the plates to be cleared, Emily declares that she's not done, and eats as slowly as possibly. Lorelai's response? "That'll do, Pig."

You don't need to know what movie "That'll do, Pig," originally comes from. Nor do you need to know where the updated, "That'll do, Donkey," can be found. All you need to know is that Lorelai is applauding Emily's defiance. And you get that.

Me, Personally

People not getting what I'm saying is a big worry for me. I lived in the US for 2 of my 30 years, but I've spent the majority of my life outside of "mainstream Western countries." My books are set in Barbados or Japan. They all feature Barbadian characters. I've always feared that there would be way too much that other people wouldn't understand.

Not to mention, I have lived in other countries, and even before I did, I lived a relatively multicultural life. So there are references I make that Barbadians and other Caribbean people might miss. Now, I realise that my readers are smart enough to get it from context. And if it can't be deduced from context, then it's probably superfluous - me showing off my "multicultural darlings."

In the book I'm working on now (which went on pause when I got gastro last week, and is now in a sad state of flux), some girls are talking about suicide. And the MC says something about carving the Broken Trident into your wrists. Now you don't have to know that the Broken Trident is the name of the Barbados flag, and the black shape in the middle. You get that it's about slashing wrists.

(Photo: Barbados Flag and I on top of Mount Fuji.)

SECOND LEVEL

One Piece

 

ONE PIECE is one of the anime series I follow. I really love that there are these things that I get, that I don't think most of the viewing public does. Like watching a Gilmore Girls episode and catching a reference to Casablanca or another old movie, it instills a weird sense of pride. I love the One Piece references because they're drawn from so many cultures, which is perfect for me. 

The ship's navigator/weather girl is called Nami. Nami means "(sea) wave"  in Japanese. Perfect name for a ship's navigator? Yups. Of course, all Japanese people can get that reference if they think about it for a second.  The ship's swordsman is Zoro, a clear reference to the Latino sword hero, and a reference I think all Westerners get. There's a cyborg called Frankie, as well. Reference: Frankenstein. And Usopp uses both Japanese and Western references. When his character was first introduced he was known for his wild stories."Uso" is Japanese for lie. Back that up with his ridiculously long nose, a clear reference to Pinocchio. Then there are the references which are outside English and Japanese, like Nami's adoptive mother, "Belle-mere", whose name is French for Mother-in-law. 

You don't have to get a single one of these references to watch the show, but I love them, and it makes the show exist on a different level for me. It's like when you watch Shrek as a kid and it's so cute. And then you watch it as an adult, and see all the perverted bits. 

Me, Personally

In one scene of my new WIP, the MC steps into the hallway, and everybody stops talking and just stares at her, like she was "covered in a vat of pig's blood." 

If you don't get the reference, then the meaning is still clear. But if you've watched or read Stephen King's CARRIE, then it calls up another level for you. It's the ultimate in high-school ostracism. And it might even signal to you that this chick is about to lose her shiz.

WRAP IT UP 

At the end of the day, I'd like to say a big thank you to Gilmore Girls for teaching me this lesson. It's an extremely relevant one for me. Since my references are so different, I was either going to have to bend myself to an American norm, tone down my voice, limit myself to Caribbean audiences or stop writing. And none of those choices felt right. Now I know I can make references, and it's fine if my readers can't see every level of the picture I'm painting, so long as they hear what I've said.

What they think I do

Has anyone seen that meme? You know the one: What society thinks I do, What my mom thinks I do, What my friends think I do, etc? Well, I allude to my job pretty often on here, but  it occurs to me, that I don't really talk about what I do. So here goes. This is the first of two parts: today, I'll be talking about the teaching.

JET

I came to Japan on the Japan Exchange and Teaching Programme -JET. JET is a government-organised programme. It recruits foreigners through Japanese embassies around the world to come here as ALTs, CIRs and SEAs. CIRs are Coordinators for International Relations. They work in International departments of city offices. SEAs are Sports Exchange Advisors. They're accomplished in a Sport and come to Japan as coaches.

My job title is Assistant Language Teacher (ALT).There are a lot of reasons for the word "Assistant" in the title. In Japan, the word "teacher" is a funny thing. "Sensei" is used as a term of respect, and the kanji technically say "ahead of student," but the term has a connotation of having sat an exam. In my country (backbush) area, the word Sensei gets thrown around like it's a ventriloquist's voice. But in some places people get nitpicky. Technically, if you haven't sat the Japanese exam, you're not a "sensei," your a "kyoushi" (instructor). Additionally, I've heard you're technically not allowed to be left alone with a class if you haven't passed your teacher's exam.

JUNIOR HIGH

The word Assistant also reflects the format that the job most often takes: team teaching. In my particular junior high school (JHS), team teaching isn't restricted to foreign languages. Maths and Japanese and Science will often be team taught. Outside of foreign languages, team-teaching is basically one teacher standing at the front teaching, and the other teacher acting as support, helping students who need a little extra time, etc. In the case of foreign languages, it generally means that the Japanese Teacher of English/Language (JTE/L) teaches grammar and the ALT is generally responsible for pronunciation, and the occasional game.

In my first 3 years, I worked with two JTEs, one of whom had me do warm up games almost every game, and for the rest of class, I did support, or pronunciation, depending on what the lesson was concentrating on. I usually went to every class he had. The other JTE didn't take me to class as much. She had a really good grasp of English and pronunciation, and she did most of it herself.

They transfer teachers here every year, and last April I was shaken when they switched both of my JTEs at the same time. I almost cried. Seriously. But it turned out to be a blessing. As they were both new to me, and the school, there was no "precedence" for anything, so we wrote a whole new script. This past year, instead of going to all the classes with my main JTE, I go to about half of them. But instead of a 5 minute warm up game, I often have a 20 minute game or the whole session to myself. It's probably a little less time withthe kids, but I'm probably causing a bigger affect with English learning.

ELEMENTARY

Elementary school is a grab bag. At my main school, "the big school," I have never team-taught. Not  even when I first came and only knew enough Japanese to ask where the toilet was. (You'd be surprised how well you can communicate without the use of actual language. Mime is a brilliant invention!) The teachers are always in the classroom with me, but I guess they got spoiled by the ALT before me. He did all his classes by himself, too. Even when they started using a "textbook" (there really isn't much text in it), and the guidebook was ENTIRELY in Japanese, I still had to do it on my own. That guidebook is half the reason I'm semi-literate. lol. At tiny school (less than 30 kids, yes, the whole school), the 5/6 joint class teacher sometimes takes the lead, and sometimes she asks me to.

The actual class content, is mostly vocab based around a topic, and games. The objective is not grammatical correctness, but concept and to open the kids' minds to the foreign world and learning English (and/or other foreign languages) in the future. At elementary school I spend a surprising amount of time cutting up paper and card, drawing anime characters, making Bingo sheets... Just today, I wrote(/drew) "Hello" in 9 languages, including 5 which don't use Roman script. Don't ask me when I'll need to write I'll ever need to write Hello in Cyrillic, or Devanagari or Hangul, but having written each about 10 times, I now know how to! ( Need to find a reason to put this is my resume.)

Actually, now that I'm mainly responsible for innovative ways of getting the kids to use English in JHS as well, I spend an inordinate amount of time there drawing scenes for the kids to hide rabbits in, and compiling reports about Valentine's Day around the world.

KINDERGARDEN

"Teaching" kindergarden is some of the most fun I have at work. Essentially, we (all 3 town ALTs together) teach the kids a vocab set, like colours or animals, invent a game for us to play, and essentially just spend the entire time running around. It's FAB! Oh, and in Japan, there's a Hello Song. I don't know where it came from, but it seems to be coast to coast, and all English learners seem to know it. We got bored and remixed that Sound of Music song into The Goodbye Song, actions and all. The kiddles and teachers all think it's like a legit song, not something we half-stole from Rodgers and Hammerstein.

Sound of Music - So Long...  Farewell


That's all the stuff that I'm scheduled for by the Board of Education of my town - my employers. Come back next week to find out what I actually do. (Of course I do all this stuff, as well. Obvsie Bovsie.)

The Immortal Rules - Review and Giveaway

I was lucky enough to receive access to a galley of The Immortal Rules by Julie Kagawa. Remarkably, I hadn't read anything else by her, even though the whole bloggosphere has been raving about the Iron Fey series forever. The series just didn't strike me as something I'd like, but I'm definitely going to try them out now.

From Goodreads:

Allison Sekemoto survives in the Fringe, the outermost circle of a vampire city. By day, she and her crew scavenge for food. By night, any one of them could be eaten.

Some days, all that drives Allie is her hatred of them. The vampires who keep humans as blood cattle. Until the night Allie herself is attacked—and given the ultimate choice. Die… or become one of the monsters.

Faced with her own mortality, Allie becomes what she despises most. To survive, she must learn the rules of being immortal, including the most important: go long enough without human blood, and you will go mad.

Then Allie is forced to flee into the unknown, outside her city walls. There she joins a ragged band of humans who are seeking a legend—a possible cure to the disease that killed off most of humankind and created the rabids, the mindless creatures who threaten humans and vampires alike.

But it isn't easy to pass for human. Especially not around Zeke, who might see past the monster inside her. And Allie soon must decide what—and who—is worth dying for.

Vampires? Really? I mean they've been done to death, and brought back to life. (Sorry, couldn't resist.) The approach, however, is completely different. These vamps are not fuzzy-wuzzy sparkle puffs. Despite the fact that there is an organised system for obtaining blood, these vampires still kill on occasion. And when Allie joins the ranks, she has a real struggle with who she is and not hurting those around her.

Another refreshing thing about this book is that it combines vampires with a few other speculative fiction arenas. It's a postapocalyptic world. A virus has killed off much off the human race. The rules of living have been redefined. Allie lives in a Vampire City. The walls protect the humans from rabids and in return most of the humans are Registered to donate their blood to keep the vampires fed. It seems like a semi-equal exchange. But in the very first scene, some Unregistereds are brought to justice for stealing, even though there is no food provided for Unregistereds. The opression adds dystopian elements to the plot.  And of course, there are the rabids. The rabids are essentially zombies. Like all zombies, they seem to have one overwhelming impulse: eat.

Let's not forget that the kick-butt heroine, Allie, is Asian. Honestly, I can only think of one other spec-fic YA book with an Asian heroine.

I think it's the combination of all these things: vampires, post-apocalypse, dystopia, rabid/zombies - that make the book a winner.

But there are 2 more elements I feel like I should mention. Zeke and Kanin. Zeke is a possible love interest. He's been raised to despise vampires and Allie knows this. Since leaving the city, she's been surviving by pretending to be human, but how long can she really keep that up, right? Then there's Kanin, the vampire that changed Allie. Kanin is all "Oh, humans are just your food," yet he doesn't kill them, and is as humane as someone can be to their prey. And Kanin is obviously troubled. I fell right into him. Totally wanted to hug him and make it all better, and then go beat up the people that made him feel bad. lol.

To win a copy of THE IMMORTAL RULES, just tell me what's your fave type of vampire?
This contest is open internationally until Wednesday April 25 at 11.59 pm EST.

Out to All

I believe "out to all" might be a Bajan term, so I'll define it for you. It means "fast as possible." For example:

"Wuh of course he get in a accident, he had the car out to all."

or, in Standard English.

"I'm not surprised he had an accident, driving that fast."


As, I mentioned last week, I've decided to write a book in a week (approx.). My 4 day total is 17,000 words-ish, way below where it should be, and my brain is fried today, so I've taken it off. But whatever else happens the week (approx.) I've realised a couple of things.

1. MY NATURAL SPEED

I've mentioned time and again that I have two speeds: off and whoosh! And yet, I spend so much of my time trying to fit into a world somewhere in between there.

Nanowrimo is a 30 day challenge in November to write a 50,000 novel. Lots of writers think that's too insane a pace. Some go as far as to put it down. "What can you write in 30 days that was even worth writing?" I've done it 4 years, and "won" every time. In the in-between times, I've tried my hand at novelling pursuits. I think this is the first time I've passed 10K outside Nano.

Why should it matter? The fact that I'm able to crank out 13,000 words in a day (that only happened once) should be a good thing. Why is it that I slow myself down to a "normal pace?" It got me to thinking about life in general. I'm likely to just jump into "huge" things.

Like, India. I was listening to an online radio thingy and this one gospel song made me feel like I should be helping the human race somehow. A message box popped up: you've got mail. It was a program to go to India and build houses for Dalit people. In a split second I knew I was going. Technically I didn't have the money, and I literally ate ramen all month, but I got there, and it's a trip I will never forget. But many people would have weighed options and stuff. And some of my friends did criticise me for making a split second decision that affected my eating habits.

The song that led me to India. Give Me Your Eyes, by Brandon Heath.

But this is my natural speed. I've been apologetic for it, and I probably will be again. Right now, however, I realise that I can only be who I am. And this is who I am. This is how I operate.

I remember one episode of Alladin, the animated series, where Alladin was fleeing, and asked genie to turn into something with legs. Genie turned into a table. Alladin (exasperated) asked for "legs that move," and the table started to gallop. Alladin's assessment? "Whatever works!"

If a process, or a lifestyle works for you, it works for you. I don't believe that I get the right to critique anyone else's choices. I shouldn't worry so much about making mine conform.

2. WORK HARD, PLAY HARD

Chris Baty, the founder of Nanowrimo (man, I sound like a commercial), wrote a book called NO PLOT, NO PROBLEM. In that book, he reccommends NOT taking time off to write. When he took a sabbatical from life to have writing time, he found himself doing everything but. "Ooo, look at this thing that's been broken for like 5 years, and I haven't needed it all that time, wouldn't now be a great time to fix it?"

I've found, in the last 4 days, that the (sort-of) inverse is also true. Fitting in 5,000 words a day has somehow pushed all the other parts of my life to the extreme. (Except house-cleaning. House-cleaning for me is like that one seed in your class science project that just didn't germinate. lol) So, I write 5,000 words, and I teach all my classes, and I read blogs, and I update Facebook, and read Twitter, and watch a movie, and catch up my anime, and read novels. Seriously, I have watched a movie EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. since I started my writing project.

It's counter-intuitive, but it seems to me that the relationship between time and time usage is inversely-proportional. The more time you use, the more time you seem to have. Actually, what probably happens is this: being super-productive in one area, pushes you to be more effective in others. Even on the internet, the world's most notorious time-suck, I'm not spending my time faffing around. I'm doing the things I'm supposed to be doing.

I guess the lesson here is that it is hard to make time to write. But it's possible that making that time, can make you more efficient in the hours your not at the desk.

It's Monday, that's the contents of my mind.

Why's 7 lucky anyhow?

Guess which one of your crazy bloggy friends is writing a novel this week? Yeps, that would be me. What's so crazy about writing a novel? Not a thing. Except I'm attempting to do it in about a week or so.

Why a week? Because...

1 - I have other stuff that needs doing
2 - I have two speeds, OFF and What the heck just blew threw here?
3 - At the end of every nano (30 days, 50,000 words challenge in November) I overcome more and more ridiculous deficits to win at the buzzer. I think my most has been a 13,000 word day.

Anyhow, I started today, and I've got 5700 words down. I'm a little behind, but meh.

On to bizz...

The Most Marvelous Marsha tagged me in the Lucky 7 Meme. Check Marsha out if you haven't. She's like my twin, but American, white, and miles funnier.

Here be the rules:
1. Go to page 77 of your current MS
2. Go to line 7
3. Copy down the next seven lines as they are written - no cheating!
4. Tag 7 other writers and let them know

(Now, let me just say that I had a lot of trouble with my last nano. After 2 false starts, I ended up switching to this novel, which I wrote both by hand AND on the computer. This came from page 77 of what is on the comp, so it's technically not really page 77, but there's no way to know where page 77 really is, and I like this clip, so there.  Let me know what you think. See if you can guess what's going on. )

Anna,

I’m sorry. I will keep saying it until you accept it. I was glad that at the airport you let me hug you. You let me speak to you. I hope you forgive me soon.

Adair.

He writes in English. He’s never spoken English to me. His little brothers and even Marc, the littlest Eduoard-Rose at only 5, would try a phrase or two. But he insisted that his English was “incorrigible”. I wonder how long it took him to write and translate this.

 For my 7 writer-friends:

A.T Post at The Sententious Vaunter
Clarissa at Clarissa Draper
E.J. Wesley at The Open Vein
ElbieNy25 at The Journey
JP at Where Sky Meets Ground
Lydia at The Sharp Angle
Sophia at My Fleet-Footed Self

As always, if you don't have as much time for faffing around as I do, or if you've already done this meme, feel free to ignore. :)

Well, there you have it. Back to my novelling. :) 

Screen vs. Print

I'm in a screenplay mood. A lot of things have combined to get me here. Firstly, when I went off books earlier in the year, I read a couple of screenplays that I had sitting around the house. (Here in Japan, they sell screenplays and their accompanying CDs as a tool for learning natural English. I bought them as a tool for teaching natural English, but have never used them.)

Then there's my attempt to read up on writing humour. Unfortunately, very few books have been written on writing humour for novels. There are a few on injecting humour into articles and speeches, but the grand majority are about performance comedy: stand-up, sketch and sitcom. Plus, I read the eternally raved-about SAVE THE CAT, (I'm not a big fan, but that's a story for another day) and that's technically a screen-writing book.

Top all of that off with the fact that I'm one of the few who spends as many hours in front of a screen as staring at words in print. I'm just as comfortable watching 60 episodes of an anime in a single weekend, as I am reading 4 novels. (And yes, both have happened.)

So, between reading screenplays and screenwriting books, and watching movies and Dawson's Creek and Gilmore Girls and anime, I got to thinking. There are some things that work so much better in one medium than another.

Gilmore Girls revolves around dialogue. It revolves around that dialogue being said insanely fast. That's something that just wouldn't come over well on the page. Also, think of superheros. Superheros always come in visual form. Before they were on tv, Batman, Spiderman and Superman were comincs - technically print, but also using pictures. I'm not sure how well any of them would do as a novel. The same thing for musicals. I read the novelization of DREAMGIRLS. I can't even think of a comment for it.

And there are certain stories that work better as books. Stories where there's a lot of introspection are difficult to put on screen. Either you have constant voiceovers (which I am not a fan of, and which kind of feel like cheating) or you lose half the depth of the story. Also stories where there's not a lot of action are hard on screen. The brother of the husband of the Assistant Regional Advisor for SCBWI Tokyo (whew!) is in the film industry.  He says there's nothing worst than filming a writer writing.

Having consumed 100+ books in 2012, and watched 6 seasons of Dawson's Creek and 7 seasons of Gilmore Girls in the past 2 months, the screen vs print considerations are very fresh in my mind, and I think this is something I'll be coming back to.

What about you, what are the important differences between screen and print? Do you prefer certain stories via certain media?

The zombie virus known as stupid

 Thanks for the love on yesterday's post. I should clear up that I am not working out on account of my horrific body image. I'm working out firstly as a counter-balance to Bipolar Disease; secondly to be in shape for a race in May (and next May) and my eventual return to amateur sport; and thirdly for the fact that pretty much every chronic hereditary disease known to man runs through my family.

Hopefully, my body image gets back to normal pretty soon. But it may not, seeing as I, like Gaston, am "roughly the size of a barge!"

 Click for source.

Today, though, I want to talk about stupidity. I know that's crueler than my normal tone, but it's been a bad day. 

 In my evil moments, Michel Gérard is my hero.

STUPID QUESTIONS

You know in class, when the teacher says there are no stupid questions? Lies! All lies! Maybe in that particular environment, it's fine to ask whatever wanders across the slippery swamp you like to think of as your mind. But in real life, please, a moment of reflection. 

Case in point: some time ago, a friend asked me to talk to someone who was interested in coming to to Japan on my programme. I love this programme. I love the opportunity it gave me. I love my dinkville town. So I'm always glad to take the time to help out those who are interested. And I'm generally pretty good about keeping an open mind. But this one person drives me up a wall asking me nonsense - 90% of the time it's irrelevant or out of my realm of expertise. 

Recently: 

"Hey Claire. You're still in Japan? I was wondering what you need to teach English in Dubai?" 

Errrrr??? Wait, is Dubai in Japan? Is Japan a colony of Dubai? Do I spend my vacations in Dubai? Did I almost go to Dubai to teach English?

Maybe the reason your teacher tells you there are no stupid questions is because they've never gotten one. Probably because I get their share. 

SAY WHAT? 

Ever have a conversation with someone who just could not understand what you were talking about? I'm not talking rocket science. I'm not  even talking specialist vocab. I mean, I don't expect the most brilliant of my friends to understand when I talk about ARCs, pre-empts, MSs, MCs, or Dark Nights of the Soul (absolute favourite literary term :) And I don't expect you guys to understand my job or Japan related terms. When I mention JET, ALTs, tenkin, sakuramochi, etc, I explain. 

No, I'm talking about a normal conversation. A conversation where you ask "when?" And receive a verb as an answer. Oh, or better yet, when the answer has absolutely no relation to the question. And then you have to keep breaking down your original question until it's Gerber's Peas and Carrots. 

Thanks, but no thanks. You are the weakest link. Goodbye. 

COMMA, FULL STOP.

(for Americans who might not know, "full stop" is what we British system types call the dot at the end of a sentence.)

There is nothing like having to communicate mostly by IM to really understand the difference between levels of intelligence/education. I've got one friend who I honestly believe has not used a punctuation mark in all 4 years I've been here. Hismessagesarriveasoneindecipherablechunk. It's not quite that bad, but that's what it feels like. 

I appreciate that people make typos and that there is a reduced need for punctuating online. Still, the end objective is communication. If I have to read each "sentence" 5 times and a few minutes of conversation give me a headache, you're doing something wrong. 

WHERE I END UP

In Barbados, we enter secondary school according to our results in an island-wide exam. (British system peeps may have - or have had - the Common Entrance Exam.) I went the top school, meaning, obviously, I was smart. I always prided myself on being the type of person that didn't let that go to my head. To make sure of that, I never differentiated against anyone on the basis of intelligence or intellectual ability. In fact, I don't really discriminate for anything. If you want to be my friend, I'm like koolio!

Clearly that strategy has failed, as I am now up to my neck in stupid questions and indecipherable conversations. It's beginning to feel like an epidemic. Like more people are getting stupider. And I'm beginning to wonder if maybe I do need to set up some lower limits. I mean I never have these issues with certain people, and I always have them with others. 

What do you think? Should I start "discriminating?" Hide from the people who give me headaches? Tell them straight-up they're not making sense? Do you "discriminate" when making friends? Do any of these things make you crazy?  Is the virus spreading?

Bus in Reverse

Time for another edition of Monday on my Mind. This Monday?





I hate my body.

Maybe that shouldn't be surprising considering I've been overweight/obese for 90% of my life. But, no matter what sort of shape I was in, I've never hated my body. Saturday night that changed. We were watching a DVD of the anniversary event at the Reggae Bar I go to. I was "wining" on the wall, and I couldn't believe how absolutely huge I was.

Even though I've been the same size since my Australia trip of 2009 (gained 7 kilos on that trip, somehow), this feeling has come over me fairly suddenly. But I suppose it's not entirely without warning.

WHAT THE HECK HAPPENED?
More and more as I looked in the mirror, I wasn't liking what I was seeing. And then factor in where I live as opposed to where I used to live... As I've mentioned before, Barbados is an overwhelmingly Black country. Black people seem to carry weight better than other races. In addition to which black men generally prefer more curves than white guys, or Asian guys. So as a teen, my ample hips were a good thing, garnering me attention even from "big men." Now, living in Japan, a country where the women's shoes tend to run up to about an 8 (US) and anyone above a size 12 (US) in clothes has trouble finding clothes.

At first, it's a bit depressing, but then you get used to it. You tell yourself their make-up is different, and you could not be that small even if you te only 15 rice grains a day. Still it got to me eventually. In most Western countries, I'd be considered fat/obese, but I would not be alone, and there'd be loads of people bigger than I am. At home, there would even be some people who'd consider me attractive as is. Here in Japan, I can only recall seeing 2 people bigger than me. In all 4 years. Sometimes, I'm tempted to ask where they buy their clothes, but I feel like that would be super-inappropriate since fat stands out so much more here. (One of them is a friend though, so I'll ask eventually.)

FIXING THE PROBLEM
My problem is twofold really. Firstly, I'm fat. Secondly, I suddenly have a horrible self image.

FIGHTING THE FAT
I'm doing all the right things to change my body. I resolved to work out this year, originally to keep my bipolar in order. Since then, I've resolved to do Jillian Michael's 30 Day Shred in all the 30 day months (four times a year).

Somehow, despite the fact that I'm doing all I'm supposed to be doing workout-wise, I'm not getting any results. I've managed to increase my body fat percentage. That's not going to discourage me from workouts, since weight-loss/size is not my prime goal, but still it would be nice to look like I work out, dang it!

SELF IMAGE
Can I tell you a secret? I'm not sure if I want to fix it. I feel like going through the positive self-talk to get me to a place where I love my body would actually be detrimental to my fitness goals. I mean, if I love being fat and unfit, why workout?

On the other hand, I'm a bit afraid not to fix it. I don't diet. That's partly because I'm too lazy to make the effort it requires and partly because I'm a naturally healthy eater. But another part of it is that I'm an extremist. I'm afraid I'd end up only eating once a day for 30 seconds, or something similarly stupid. Now that I hate my body, I'm tempted to workout twice a day, 7 days a week, since nothing else seems to be working. That would possibly do more harm than it's worth. But a part of me just doesn't care.

Who knows? Maybe it will fix itself. Maybe when I look in the mirror I won't see a long-haul bus in reverse. Maybe I'll just see a woman.

It's Monday. That's what's on my mind.

The perks of not fitting in

This is kind of a flip of Tuesday's post, "The perks of fitting in." Great comments on that post. Thanks. In particular, Asia's comment about a writer's fame reminded me of something.

"The best fame is a writer's fame. It's enough to get a table at a good restaurant, but not enough to get you interrupted when you eat." - Fran Leibowitz

Everybody wants to be famous. But why would you when you have to deal with constant scrutiny and paparrazzi and time suck and...I'll tell you why. The perks!

UNFORGETTABLE, THAT'S WHAT YOU ARE*

Quick, think of the creepiest guy in your final year of secondary school. Now tell me who sat 4 seats to the leftor right of you in your Maths class. One of the perks of standing out, is that people remember you, whether you stand out for a good reason or a bad one.

MY GREAT-UNCLE SECOND COUSIN'S BOYFRIEND'S BEST FRIEND

When you're popular or famous, everybody wants to be your friend. Or at least, claim a connection to you. I tell lots of people that my brother went to school with Rihanna.  Even though I've never so much as seen her in person.

This can be a double-edged sword. You can be left wondering if people just talk to you because you're a writer, a foreigner, a black person, a submarine co-pilot, or if they actually like you for you.

 Rihanna in primary school. My brother went to secondary school with her, but I couldn't find a secondary school pic.

CHEERS...I'LL DRINK TO THAT**

On Tuesday, I mentioned the haters, but there are also people that want you to win. You want your favourite author's next book to be great. You want your fave celebs to step out looking hot. When you're on top, people you've never met and never thought of are cheering for you. Don't believe me? Go on twitter and search a singer/actor/writer's name.

I WANNA SEE YOUR PEACOCK-COCK-COCK***

Here's the thing: you don't fit in, and you're not going to. Why try? Why not be as extreme as you feel like. As far as I know, there are only 2 black girls in a 100 km radius. And one is moving on Saturday. As I've lived here 4 years now, I hardly get stared at anymore. But I still don't fit in, and I never will. At first, I worried about that, worried that my area would judge all black females/people against me. They probably will.

But it's also liberating. They have noone to judge me against, so I can be as crazy as I want. Sometimes the mood hits me and I start to sing while I walk to work. What? Noone is going to understand me, and it's not like I can get  any stranger, anyhow. Also I wear a ridiculous amount of pink and purple clothing. I'm like a fat Nicki Minaj. I'm not letting this chance pass me by :)

Want an example from the famous types? Consider how many celebrity children are named things like Apple and Banjo and Blanket.

 Helena Bonham Carter has a blast not fitting in.

THERE IS NOONE ALIVE THAT IS YOUER THAN YOU****

And the best thing about standing out? You don't have to restrict who you are. I mean, you can choose to -- lots of celebrities try to stay off worst-dressed lists. But take a look at Helena Bonham Carter, a self-declared anti-fashionista. She dresses how she feels and it works for her.

How do you feel abotu these perks? Can you think of any others? Would you rather fit in or not? 

* Nat King Cole
** Rihanna
*** Katy Perry
**** Dr. Seuss