Thursday, April 5, 2012

The perks of not fitting in

This is kind of a flip of Tuesday's post, "The perks of fitting in." Great comments on that post. Thanks. In particular, Asia's comment about a writer's fame reminded me of something.

"The best fame is a writer's fame. It's enough to get a table at a good restaurant, but not enough to get you interrupted when you eat." - Fran Leibowitz
Everybody wants to be famous. But why would you when you have to deal with constant scrutiny and paparrazzi and time suck and...I'll tell you why. The perks!


Quick, think of the creepiest guy in your final year of secondary school. Now tell me who sat 4 seats to the leftor right of you in your Maths class. One of the perks of standing out, is that people remember you, whether you stand out for a good reason or a bad one.


When you're popular or famous, everybody wants to be your friend. Or at least, claim a connection to you. I tell lots of people that my brother went to school with Rihanna.  Even though I've never so much as seen her in person.

This can be a double-edged sword. You can be left wondering if people just talk to you because you're a writer, a foreigner, a black person, a submarine co-pilot, or if they actually like you for you.

 Rihanna in primary school. My brother went to secondary school with her, but I couldn't find a secondary school pic.


On Tuesday, I mentioned the haters, but there are also people that want you to win. You want your favourite author's next book to be great. You want your fave celebs to step out looking hot. When you're on top, people you've never met and never thought of are cheering for you. Don't believe me? Go on twitter and search a singer/actor/writer's name.


Here's the thing: you don't fit in, and you're not going to. Why try? Why not be as extreme as you feel like. As far as I know, there are only 2 black girls in a 100 km radius. And one is moving on Saturday. As I've lived here 4 years now, I hardly get stared at anymore. But I still don't fit in, and I never will. At first, I worried about that, worried that my area would judge all black females/people against me. They probably will.

But it's also liberating. They have noone to judge me against, so I can be as crazy as I want. Sometimes the mood hits me and I start to sing while I walk to work. What? Noone is going to understand me, and it's not like I can get  any stranger, anyhow. Also I wear a ridiculous amount of pink and purple clothing. I'm like a fat Nicki Minaj. I'm not letting this chance pass me by :)

Want an example from the famous types? Consider how many celebrity children are named things like Apple and Banjo and Blanket.

 Helena Bonham Carter has a blast not fitting in.


And the best thing about standing out? You don't have to restrict who you are. I mean, you can choose to -- lots of celebrities try to stay off worst-dressed lists. But take a look at Helena Bonham Carter, a self-declared anti-fashionista. She dresses how she feels and it works for her.

How do you feel abotu these perks? Can you think of any others? Would you rather fit in or not? 

* Nat King Cole
** Rihanna
*** Katy Perry
**** Dr. Seuss


Sidrah said...

I have been a so-so. Never really stood out except when I was kinda chubby in school =P It used to bother me a bit, but now am content with my introvert self who has a few but really great friends =]

Btw I love Helena Carter and her eccentric style =D

Megan said...

Love Bonham-Carter...

I've always been a "weirdo", both physically, with my interests and in my personality. It's taken a while to really appreciate the freedom it's given me in life.

Great post!

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