Friday, October 22, 2010

Why After-work yoga was a bad idea

10. You are on Day 5 of your 13 day week, and your 5th day of working til 6 or 7 (for a teacher that's late) and you're exhausted.

9. You finish work too late to go home, and too early to just sit at the Hall, so you'll go to the complex across the street to buy socks. $100 later you'll condone yourself with the fact that you actually needed everything you bought.

8. When you finally get to yoga, the guy at the door who takes your 200 yen ($1.50USish) will remind you that you met at the Hip Hop class, and you will spend half the class daydreaming about how YUM he is and how you'll see him at Hip Hop on Tuesday instead of concentrating on the yoga instructor's words...

7. Which are obviously in Japanese, and she's talking in this soft soothing voice, which is great for setting a yoga mood and all but not so great when you're trying to listen to your 5th language. Also, you're exhausted. The combination of little Ms. Soothy Voice and lying on a comfy mat, is really making you want to snooze.

6. You will realise, minutes into the class, that you don't know the Japanese word for breathe, which you've never needed to use, but which might be handy in yoga.

5. When you have to turn over to go into Locust pose, you will be staring straight at YUM's butt. And there goes your concentration again.

4. Even though you're more flexible than average, Japanese people have no bones. You will look over at the instructor and she will have her head between her legs. Meanwhile, you'll be flailing to try and grasp your foot, and thinking you might look like the spawn of a crazy donkey and suffocating goldfish. Then the instructor will calmly mention that she's 50. You'll thinking about throwing your 28 year old body off a bridge, but the thought of the freezing water will stop you.

3. When the class is over, your unmentionables will be so far up your unmentionable, you will contemplate surgery. Then you'll think about trying to explain your dilemma in Japanese, and decide that your unmentionables will either come out willingly or you will learn to live with them where they are.

2. When you actually get home, it's late and you've missed the package you've been waiting on all week- 3 books on the craft, of writing of course. And you kind of knew that this was going to happen, because you won't be home all weekend to receive them. (And yes, Japan Post works 7 days a week, delivery from 7 am to 9 pm.)

And the number 1 reason why after work yoga was a bad idea?

1. You'll be too tired to write the post you intended to write, and feel guilty. But you'll try to tell yourself this post wasn't half bad. And then you'll give up and go to bed, because you have a 13 hour day tomorrow, Saturday, and another on Sunday, so you hope your wonderful readers will forgive you.

And a photo collage of last weekend's trip to Sendai.

I spent half of Saturday at the hostkid's Day Care Sports.

13 month old host-sis doing the Class Dance.

Host "Mom" with host sis.

Crazy races are the order of every Japanese Sports Day

In this game you had to grab other kid's hats without lossing your own, all while piggybacking on Mom or Dad.

Parents had to grab a card, and depending on what they got, and who they matched up with, they'd jump into a huge pair of underpants, wear a tiedup skipping rope like a train or share an umbrella as they raced to the finish line.

Host bro doing his dance.

In front of one of the Date Samurai at Sendai Museum.

My host siblings are too cute!

Samurai Date Masumune's statue at Sendai Castle (where there's no longer an actual castle. lol)

Sendai speciality- cow tongue. It was absolutely delicious. I at it at the oldest cow tongue restaurant in Sendai, and learned the word for absolute mindboggling happiness.


Off to bed. :)


Clarissa Draper said...

The Japanese are crazy and loveable at the same time and I can say this because my mom is Japanese. Thank you for your wonderful comment on my blog.


Marsha Sigman said...

OMG, those kids are sooo cute!!! You were totally right about that!lol

This post was freakin' hilarious. I laughed the entire time I was reading it. I have lived the american version of that same situation. Only it was kick-boxing. I didn't last long in that class. I liked the idea of kick-boxing more than the reality.

Alleged Author said...

This was a great post! I can't even fathom yoga. I tried it once with disastrous results. My mom used to make cow tongue when I was little because it was cheap. I highly doubt it tasted anything like your fab meal! I wish we had had that restaurant around when I was growing up!

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