I am a woman, not a piece of meat!

In my first real job, I worked a retail agent in the shoe department of the largest department store on the island, Cave Shepherd. I worked while I was in school during the vacations and on weekends. While I was there, I prefered to sell men's shoes for two reasons. Firstly, because men's shoes are much more expensive. Only full time workers got commission, but I gave my commission to another worker, and it was a sort of competition to see who could sell the greatest value of shoes.

The second reason I prefered to work in the mens' section was this. Men know what they want. Plain and simple. Men generally don't like shopping. They walk in, look around, find what they want, get their size and buy it. If a man walks into a shoe store it's because he needs a shoe!

Woman are an all around different story. Half the time, they're in the store because they're bored, and aren't really looking for a shoe. Even when they are actually looking for a shoe, 9 sales out of 10 will go like this:

Me: May I help you?
Customer: Sure. I would like a six 6.
(I bring a 6 and watching the lady try to stuff her foot into it. I can see from the fit, that the lady is clearly at least an 8 1/2. )

Customer: I don't know what's wrong. I always wear a 6. Let me try the 7.

(First off, you do not always wear a 6, unless you're in an American store and you always wear a British 6 (American 8). Secondly, there's no way that you're a 7 either. But being the wonderful Customer Service Agent that I am, I go get the lady a 7. And, surprise, surprise, it doesn't fit!)

Customer: That is so strange! Let me try an 8.

After too many rounds of cat and mouse we finally get the lady in an 8 1/2 and she buys it.

I went clothes shopping today. Trying to find an outfit always make me feel like a sausage. It did when I weighed 140 pounds, and it does now that I weigh a little over 200. I've always felt like regular stores sold sizes right up to the one below mine. When I was 14, sizes stopped at 12. When I was an 18, they stopped at 16.

I don't shop regularly and that leads toother problems. For one thing, I never know my size,and so I have to go through the demoralizing procedure of guessing. Then, because I wear my clothes until they're way too small, I always feel like a sausage.

Any of you who've struggled with weight (which is maybe 80% of women) probably know the feeling. You put on a new outfit in a store, and feel like a leg of ham in it. Your arm or your breast or your butt, is hanging out in a way it shouldn't. There are lumps in places there shouldn't be. Something isn't as covered as it should be. Et cetera, et cetera, et freaking cetera.

And we become just like the woman in the shoe store, trying out 6's when we know we're 8's. Buying almost fit's and deluding ourselves that we'll be able to fit into them by the end of the year or the end of month. It's the ultimate procrastinator's argument. I will be better the next time. But you won't. You won't be better tomorrow if you don't get better today.

The time is now!

I am not a sausage!
I am not a leg of ham!
I am not a side of beef!
I am not a buffalo or a bison or a manatee!

I am a woman, and one day I'll be able to shop like one!

Oh, and in case you're wondering what I bought in the end.



It's the worst picture ever, but this is what I'll be wearing to go out with my Uncle and his girlfriend tonight. Yes, I am hanging out with my uncle, but he's only 5 years older than me.