Thursday, July 22, 2010

Random Words of Advice

Maybe you've realised I don't like hard and fast rules. It goes against my ENFP-bipolar-Sagittarius nature. lol!

So if I'm giving advice, and not just options (because I present different options all the time) it must be something really important.

So here's the lifechanging piece of advice.

If you're ever stuck on a stationary train for 3 hours, because the tracks are flooded, and you think that it might possibly be a good idea to pull out your copy of THE HUNGER GAMES and start reading, DON'T!

There's no way that you'll finish in 3 hours and then you'll get to your destination, and instead of going straight to the club like you planned on, you'll end up in the 24 hour McDonalds eating a Teriyaki Burger Meal as slowly as you possibly can. And you'll only leave when the employee comes to tell you that the upstairs portion is closing.

And you'll be tempted to just sit downstairs, but then you'll go to the club cuz you promised the owner. And then you'll spend the first few hours sipping on Peach Fizzes and China Blues and wondering if there's anywhere in the darn club that has enough light for you to read.

And then they'll play Rihanna's Rude Boy and there will be a twiggy Japanese chick wearing less cloth than your shirt sleeve, and you'll decide to take the floor and show here how it's done. Because really you're Bajan (like Rihanna) and you've been dancing these rhythms before you were born. Plus she has no hips or butt, and those are practically a requirement to dance reggae.

So you'll go and sweat Katniss out of your brain until the first train home, when you'll make an attempt to read, but fall asleep and miss your stop. And then you'll have to get off at the next stop and take a bus back to your town, because really why is there only one a train an hour on that silly private line? And when you finally get home your brain will want to implode, because it's 9 am, and you really would like to sleep, but how can you not know what happens???? ARGH!!!

BRAIN -->> IMPLODE!!!

And so my advice:

NEVER READ THE HUNGER GAMES ON DELAYED TRAINS!

Oh, and by the way, today's post is purely hypothetical :)

Maybe.

3 comments:

PK said...

LOL.... funny stuff! :)

Alleged Author said...

LOL! You make me laugh every time!

Marsha Sigman said...

AHHHHHHH. You did it, girl, you know you did. I hate it when that happens. I have started reading when I know I will have to stop and it is pure torture!

Also, love that Rihanna song and I may not be able to shake it like I was born to it but I give it a good try.ha In the privacy of my own home, of course.